Wednesday, April 27, 2011

surveying crazyland

surprise! the release of obama's long form birth certificate certificate of live birth, didn't seem to satisfy any of the birthers. here's a list of reactions. if you find any new ones, leave them in the comments:

1. yeah but where are his school records?

2. why did it take so long to release the long-form?

3. the long-form is fake because it doesn't call the president a "negro".

4. "But! Now we have a name, right? For the attending. Can anyone find out if he exists and how dead he is? Obama's wearing a dead Connecticut man's social security number. I'm sure the MD was chosen just as carefully."

5. he STILL hasn't released his birth certificate because a "certificate of birth" is NOT THE SAME as a "birth certificate". you know, just like how a "license to drive" is NOT THE SAME as a "driver's license"

6. the certificate does not list the nationality of the parents so it must be fake.

7. the certificate doesn't have a stamp on it, it doesn't list the birth place of his parents and doesn't give his height and weight so it must be fake.

8. it's a forgery by leon penetta, which is why on the same day they released the certificate, they announced that penetta is leaving the CIA so he can start forging obama's academic records. 

9. it's a forgery look at the typeface!

10. it's a forgery because the certificate calls him "Barack Hussein Obama II" and not "Barack Hussein Obama Jr." and also because the black lines bend on the edge but the green pattern does not. (added 4/27/2011, per dagger aleph's suggestion in the comments)

11. there's no baby footprint on the certificate and the hospital listed on the certificate is currently in a building that wasn't built until 1978. (added 4/28/2011)

12. the number on the certificate don't jive with the numbers on the birth certificates of some random twins who were born the next day in the same hospital. (added 4/28/2011)

13. the widow and son of the doctor who delivered obama don't remember the birth happening, a birth that they probably were not present at and would have been completely unremarkable at the time. (added 4/28/2011)

14. the certificate is fake because i can tell from the picture that all three signatures were signed by the same  rollball pen and rollerball pens did not exist until the 1980s. (added 4/28/2011)

15. there are layers on the pdf of the certificate, so it must be fake (added 4/29/2011)